Tribute to Friends

It's about 130 in the morning and I can't sleep again. Sometimes I just can't shut my mind off when it's bedtime. It just seems to swirl round and round with random thoughts and the only way I can get them to calm down is to write about them. I always do my best writing at night anyway, when the house is quiet and everyone is asleep.

In a couple of hours I'll be sending Mike on the road again for another long work week and the house will be silent and empty once again. Don't get me wrong, there are times that I cherish that. I grew up an only child so I am used to being on my own quite a bit with lots of quiet time for reading and mulling over my thoughts. Marriage has been a HUGE adjustment for me in that aspect. Having someone around all the time sometimes has me at my wit's end. I need and crave alone time. But there are times during the week when it gets pretty lonely and I feel like I am the last person on earth. That's why I'm so incredibly lucky to have the friends I do. Fifteen years ago I never would have imagined that I'd have so many friends who I cherish and adore.

Growing up I was definitely a loner. I never had many friends, but that never really bothered me. I had my two best friends, Derek and Meghan and my good friend Jenny. What more did I need? I was never popular in school. Honestly, I was considered a dork. I was quiet, shy and felt awkward most of the time. I was introspective and hid most of my thoughts and feelings. I never dreamed there was an outgoing girl in there just waiting to burst out. I didn't fully come out of my shell until I started working at South Fork Cafe in River Falls and started college. Anyone who has ever worked in a restaurant knows that it's impossible to remain shy while working in one. Somehow, I let my true self out and was shocked when people responded to that.

I slowly began to make more friends while working at that cafe. One night my friend Kristin and I went to a party and that is when a huge turning point in my life came. I met a guy named Adam at that party. We danced together all night, but when my friend started getting hit on by a really creepy guy, we told Adam we were going to the bathroom and then ditched the party and ran to the car. I never thought I'd see him again. He was seven years older than me and we didn't run in the same circles. Lo and behold though, one day he called me. My first thought was 'how the hell did he get my phone number?' Turns out my friend Joey playing in the band talked to Adam at the end of the night and pretended to be my older brother and gave Adam my phone number.

It wasn't long before Kristin and I were hanging out at Adam's house all the time with him and his roommates Dave, Chris and Kelly. They lived in an awesome house overlooking the falls by the swinging bridge in River Falls. That house still has legendary status in my circle of friends. It was our paradise. It was in town, yet it didn't feel like it was since it overlooked Glen Park and the river. A few months later I moved in with all those guys and so began the years of living at the 'Cascade House.' And those remain the best years of my life.

That house remains the center of almost every friendship I've ever made, excluding the wonderful friends I've made through working at Philander's. But that house has a part in most of those friendships too. It was the place we all congregated and hung out. I have so many memories of that house. Terrible ones, but mostly good ones that I'll cherish until the day I die. We had so many parties there that I can't even count. People would drop in every day just to hang out, party or not. This time of year I always find myself missing that place terribly. Maybe because during the summer we were either on the screen porch or out by the fire pit almost every night of the week. Magic is the best word to describe that place.

I made so many lasting friendships while living in that house, friendships that continue to thrive to this day.

Adam has been one of the rocks in my life since the fateful night of that long ago party. Though we didn't end up together, he has remained one of my best friends. Who can forget the time he told me I was "growing on him like fungus"? Or the "Adster dance" that comes out when he's had too many of his "cocktails." He saw me through a couple horrible breakups and medical procedures and I saw him through the same. When he moved to CA to be with a girlfriend and was super unhappy, I lent him the money to move home. And I know he would do the same for me. His sense of humor is like no other on this earth. He was a groomsman at my wedding.

Through Adam I met the Kennedy clan of Butternut. They are one of the best families I know. I am proud they made me an honorary 'sister.' Chris, who lives in Japan now with his wife, is one of the smartest people I know and I miss him dearly. He is the only one who could challenge me at Trivial Pursuit. Kelly and Carrie, his sisters, are like my sisters. I am honored to be the godmother to Kelly's little girl, Alison. I was even there to witness her birth and was one of the first ones to hold her. After all, she was almost born in the back seat of my Tempo lol. Carrie lives in Altoona now and Kelly in Mosinee and even though we don't get to see each other nearly as much as we would like, I know they will always be my 'sisters.'

I also have many hilarious memories of my friends Stacy and Jess, who I met through a boyfriend of mine. They are my girls. No matter how stupid we act or if we say something thoughtless, we always forgive each other. That is what true friends do. My favorite memory of them is celebrating their birthdays in May at the house. A neighbor must have thought we were having too much fun because we got called in for a noise violation. When the police came to tell us to quiet down, they just kept sitting in the rocking chairs on the patio screaming "But it's MY BIRTHDAY!!" Yeah, we got a noise ticket that night. Whether we're sitting on a curb crying or racing down I-94 singing about alfalfa fields, there is never a dull moment with them. And that's what I love about them.

Philander's has also brought me many wonderful friendships that I never expected. Nicole, Megan and Erin also became regulars at the Cascade House doings along with a few others. But those three to this day remain my closest friends from there. I know that I can tell anything to Nicole and she will never judge or make me feel bad. Erin is always the one I can laugh with for hours, probably because her laugh is so infectious. Megan is always tells it like it is, and I admire that a lot. Dibbo's nights, 7 Bottles of Wine night, WOP parties...the list of memories is too long to write about here. I am thankful that Nicole hired me at Philander's or we never all would have been friends.

And how could I ever forget my time living at that house with all the crazy guys from the U.P? I met them all at Philander's too. Alex and Jeremy needed a place to live and I needed roommates so they moved in. Soon, more of their friends came from the U.P. to work at the refinery and before I knew it I had five 'yoopers' living with me. It was the yooper boarding house. Those couple of years were absolutely insane but so much fun. Some of them, especially Alex's cousin Jason, loved to torment me and tease me to death. Alex became one of my best friends and still is, even though he ended up moving back to MI. We had our moments where we didn't get along, but for the most part, he is the brother I never had. Whenever I see an astro van I think of me and Nicole hanging on for dear life sailing through the trees next to the Burger King drive thru. Let's just say he probably never should go there again. And Big George was always like the dad of our group, overseeing all our shenanigans and shaking his head. We lost him to leukemia last year and I miss him every day.

Derek has been my best friend for 26 years. He lived with me for a few years at the Cascade House too. I know he wasn't too fond of all the parties we had, but I know he misses it there too. Derek understands me like no other human being on this earth. He always seems to know what I'm thinking. He has seen me through every happy event and every catastrophe of my life and has rarely waivered. There is no more loyal friend to be found. He accepts every single thing about me: my tendency to be bossy, my stubborness, my drama, everything. Thank God we both were naughty in kindergarten and got put at the 'naughty' table. The bond we made there is still strong 26 years later.

My last couple blogs have been tributes to family. This one is to my friends. The people not mentioned here, like Kim, Pete, Sarah, Mandy, Meghan, Michelle, everyone else, you are all important to me too. If I wrote about everyone this blog would be even longer than it already is. I love you all though, with all my heart.

Like I mentioned, I never dreamed I would have such a big network of true friends. People naturally tend to talk about the bad things in their lives more than the good. Whenever I am having a really bad day, I just try to remember how blessed I am to have such a big friend family. And when Mike is on the road, I know I am never too far away from any of them and feel a bit less lonely. Thank you to all of my true friends, for accepting me just the way I am, the good and bad.